Friday, January 14, 2011

Changes...

Wow- have things changed! As I look back at my November & December posts about being so happy, content, and just all around settled. Funny how finding out I was pregnant turned my world upside down! We had hoped and prayed for this, and are very excited to add a new little one into our family, no matter how rough the road. I don't want to ever sound ungrateful for this pregnancy, because God has blessed me beyond measure...but oh how life has changed.

I had forgotten just how debilitating pregnancy sickness can be. Life has pretty much come to a standstill for me - I can't eat much of anything, I don't sleep at all, it is extremely hard for me to be the mother I want to be for Max, the house sits unclean, the laundry stacks up - I'm just stuck. Sitting in the house counting the minutes until one day is over and the next begins, only feeling hopeless about a new day starting. Because I will feel the same- sick. So sick that at most given moments I'm just trying to hold the gagging back in my throat. So sick that it is hard for me to read to my little boy each evening before bed. My whole body trembles constantly in pain and fear.

Feeling like this is so isolating...I can't really go out and do ANYTHING, interact with anyone, and my poor husband and son are stuck to deal with me. I am hoping it begins to ease within the next few weeks (as my first trimester ends), but am not getting my hopes up. I realize that some people will be offended by this post, that I'm complaining when God has blessed me with a baby. Please understand that I am only stating how I feel at this moment - and I know there will be times during this pregnancy that my heart leaps for joy and I won't be able to contain my excitment:) I just keep reminding myself to praise God thru this storm...I would have NOTHING without HIM.

Ok - to rewind a bit, I want to get caught up on the end of December & early January with photos! On New Year's Eve we ended up having my mom & dad, and my two cousins with their significant others over to celebrate, since I knew I wouldn't be getting out and doing anything. We had a really great meal (thanks Jessica) and then played the Wii for awhile, ended the evening with lots of laughs and 4 empty bottles of sparkling grape juice:) Earlier this week I was able to drag myself out of the house to take Max to Jasper to watch the Harlem Globetrotters - it was super cute and Max thought it was the funniest thing ever:) We had a nice evening with Gabe's parents & sister & brother-in-law and it was good to get out among other people - here are a few photos from that night:

Thanks for listening...and sorry about the whining! haha!



6 comments:

Kathy Kellen said...

Abbie...
are you not teaching right now?
I'm praying for you that you will soon be feeling better and for the little life growing inside you!!
Much love to you!!

April Stilwell said...

Abbie, I hope you start feeling better and find something to help you get through this "sicky" part of the pregnancy! Congrats to you all!!

Chelsa said...

Everyone knows you're grateful! I can't tell you how grateful I was to be pregnant w/ Corbin, but it def. didn't not mean I enjoyed feeling like I was going to puke my guts up for 8 weeks either!

Prayers for you sweet girl!

Tera said...

I've been praying for you since the day you called to tell me you were expecting because I know how your body just does not tolerate nausea AT ALL. It makes me so sad to think about you not even being able to do one of your most favorite things...reading to Max. :( Praying for it to ease up soon!! Love you!!

Ashley said...

I hope after your first trimester this eases up A LOT....I know it usually does and for your sake I want you to enjoy this pregnancy sicky free! And I know I wasn't offended from this post. It would be nice to enjoy this blessing God has given you! Take care sweetie and praying for ya!!!

JessGraceIz said...

I completely understand what you are going through and the nastiness of morning sickness...I had it really really bad with Grace too, couldn't even keep water down...But finally got through that and it made the 2nd trimester so much better and really enjoyed the rest of the pregnancy.
Take care of your self and hope you are feeling better soon.