Monday, March 30, 2009


Our first day of Spring Break was very productive:) While I was upstairs cleaning out some totes, Max decided to go downstiars and watch cartoons...after a few minutes he came upstairs with his face covered in chocolate and his shirt smeared with the evidence. Here is our conversation:

Mommy: "Max, what in the world are you doing?"

Max: " Well, first I ate a cakester, then I ate a Hershey's bar, and then I ate a Resse's cup candy bar. "
Then he puts his hand on his belly and says "Now I am REALLY full." This is mintues before lunchtime.
Well - there is only one thing to say...He is definantly his mother's son:)

Monday, March 23, 2009

Past couple of weeks in pictures...

My last post didn't have any pictures, so I thought I would catch everyone up on the last couple of weeks in our lives:)
Max and Lauren riding 4wheelers on a beautiful day!

Me, Jessica, Lauren, Hanna, and Sarah at our cookout - enjoying the sunshine!

Hanna and Lauren having fun on one of our rides:)!

This is Max's hero - cousin Logan won regional at Loogootee!!
Max took a picture of me and actually turned out really great!

Waited in line for semi-state...
The semi-state game was so much fun, and although we lost - we are SUPER proud of Logan!!

Max and Papa Delbert working outside... Max helping Nana plant flowers on another beautiful Spring day!!Max watering Nana's flowers:)! Look at those gardening gloves!! Hope everyone has a great rest of the week!

Tommy Oaks

This past Sunday I had the priviledge of hearing Tommy Oaks speak at Odon Christian Church. I have known Tommy for a long time - dating back to when he used to speak at Camp Illiana when I attended church camp. He is completely amazing...and each time I hear him it changes my life a little more:) He focused on this song (that I had never heard before) called "Come to Jesus." His sermon consisted of breaking down this song and it brought me to tears!

Weak and wounded sinner,
Lost and left to die,
O, raise your head for love is passing by,
Come to Jesus,
Come to Jesus,
Come to Jesus and LIVE.
(Some of us are at this point - lost in this world without Jesus. But He is asking you to "come" with his arms open wide.)

Now your burden's lifted,
And carried far away,
And precious blood has washed away the stain... so
Sing to Jesus ,
Sing to Jesus ,
Sing to Jesus and LIVE.
(Some of us have asked Jesus to be in control, and our sins are washed away. It is time to rejoice, so sing to Jesus!)

And like a newborn baby,
Don't be afraid to crawl,
And remember when you walk sometimes we fall... so
Fall on Jesus,
Fall on Jesus,
Fall on Jesus and LIVE.
(Some of us have messed up...we feel so inadequate and unworthy of His love. We keep making mistakes and don't know how God is ever going to forgive...but He already has!)

Sometimes the way is lonely,
And steep and filled with pain,
So if your sky is dark and pours the rain... then
Cry to Jesus,
Cry to Jesus,
Cry to Jesus and LIVE.
(Some people are just lonely. You can be in a huge crowd, but still feel that lonliness in your heart. They have forgotten what it's like to KNOW him...)

O, and when the love spills over,
And music fills the night,
And when you can't contain your joy inside... then
Dance for Jesus,
Dance for Jesus,
Dance for Jesus and LIVE.
(Some people are just filled with joy and love. Everything is going right and you have Jesus in your heart...we just feel like dancing!! Just go out behind the barn and dance...or shut the bathroom door and dance...just let it out:)!!)

And with your final heartbeat,
Kiss the world goodbye,
Then go in peace, and laugh on glory's side... and
Fly to Jesus,
Fly to Jesus,
Fly to Jesus and LIVE.
(This reminded me of Andrea Boes - who recently let go of all the pain and flew to Jesus - to LIVE!)

So no matter where you matter how you feel - you can ALWAYS come to Jesus. He is waiting patiently.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Of Butterflies and Second Chances...

I tell of hearts and souls and dances...

Butterflies and second chances;

Desperate ones and dreamers bound,

Seeking life from barren ground,

Who suffer on in earthly fate

The bitter pain of angry hate.

Might but they stop and here forgive

Would break the bonds to breathe and live

And find that God in goodness brings

A chance for change, the hope of wings

To rest in Him, and self to die

And so become a butterfly.

-Karen Kingsbury

Wednesday, March 11, 2009


Just wanted to give a big shout-out to my little cousin, Logan, who will be playing in the regionals this weekend (he's a senior on the bball team at ND)!! Logan - you are such an amazing young man - we love you so much and wouldn't know what to do without you around cracking jokes and making us laugh hysterically:)!! Good luck this weekend, and no matter what, you are #1 in our eyes!!

Pic #1: Logan with his biggest fans - his mom & dad (Larry and Gina), sister Janae, Abbie and Max, my brother Clay, and my mom Anna.

Pic #2: Logan and his little sister, Janae!

Pic #3: Max, Abbie, Logan, and Clay

Pic #4: Logan with his Aunt Bea, look at that height difference!!!! Wow!!

"The Lord is my rock and fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. " - Psalm 18:2

Monday, March 9, 2009

Monday Blues

The week has not started well for me...I'm having a really hard day today - it started last night when I got a phone call from Max at 9 p.m. (He had been with his Daddy since Sat. afternoon). I could hear Max sobbing and I asked him what was wrong. All he kept saying over and over was "I want to come home!" I tried to soothe him with my voice and kept telling him things were gonna be ok...but are they? Gil got on the phone and I asked him if I could come pick Max up, which I knew wouldn't solve anything in the long run, but it was just my maternal instincts taking over. He thought that Max had calmed down some and he would be ok to spend the night at the Toy's. As I hung up the phone, I began to sob like a baby. I was so upset that my baby was upset and I wasn't there to hold him. I spent the rest of the evening fighting the urge to drive to Loogootee, tossing and turning without Max in my bed. This is not what I wanted for my life, for my child's life.

This is exactly what I didn't want to put Max thru - I didn't want him to have to pay for the mistakes and decisions that his parents have made. I want to shield him from all the hurt, the fear, the confusion...I am counting down the mintues until I can pick him up today at the babysitters. My day is dragging by because of this...

Also, this morning I went out to my car and the battery was completely dead. I was already running late and then my car won't start!! What a way to start off on a Monday! :(

I am also the punching bag today for all those Barr-Reeve fans that are bitter about the recent sectional game.

I think I just should have stayed home today!!!!!

Here is a quote I found that brightened my day a tiny bit:

"Promise me you'll always remember:
You're braver than you believe,
and stronger than you seem,
and smarter than you think."
- A.A. Milne

Friday, March 6, 2009

Power of Prayer

I'm not really sure how to start this post, because I was so pleasantly surprised this morning and caught off guard. I wasn't even sure I was going to talk about it on my blog...because of the fact that it was one of those deeply personal moments that you don't want to end, you just want to hold it close to your heart and feel it wrap around you.

So the more I've thought about it today, the more I knew I had to dedicate a post to it! I started this blog so that some day I can print it into books, look back on where I've been, and hopefully show Max one day when he can fully appreciate it. This is why I decided to write about this special moment that I had - so that Max can see how this blog has changed his mommy - how God has used it as a tool to pull me closer to Him.

This morning I had just gotten to work and sat down at my desk, when my door opens and a sweet, sweet woman came in (that I've worked with for several years now)- looking nervous and anxious to talk. She walked straight up to me, took both of my hands in hers, and began telling me that she felt led to pray with me. She explained that she felt led to do this (even though she would have rather done it in a more "private" place) - but she is one of those people that I see as following God's call no matter what He asks her to do. She had been reading my blog and thinking about me for the last couple of weeks.

Her hands trembled as she began to pray for me - asking God to take care of Max and I, to help us deal with the situation at hand, and also to let me know how special I was to the kids at school. As her prayer ended I felt peace wash over me like never before. She wasn't there to condemn me, wasn't there to question me or accuse me (which has been done to me alot lately) - only there because God asked her to pray for my broken heart. And although it was not comfortable for her, she did what the Lord asked, and in turn blessed me more than she will ever know.

Thank you, Lord - for sending me these people who are bits of sunshine to me. They may be friends, they may be strangers...but you send different people at different times, at perfect moments, just when I need them. You are working thru these people to reach me - and now I am reaching back. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Lord - Your ways are beyond my understanding.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Happy Birthday to me!!

This is one of the more apparant times to me that time flies...when another birthday rolls around for me. Today I am 28 years old (gasp!!) which sounds terribly close to 30 - I'm keeping a low profile all day and staying in my classroom...but there is one thing that I keep thinking about on this day and it still surprises me: I am so undeniably happy!! This may sounds crazy to most of you (because of what my life has consisted of for the past year or so) - but for those of you who know me well and know what I've been thru, you know it is absolutely the truth:)

I mean, really - I am just happy and content. I couldn't always say that (and my last post didn't express that either:)!! Not that I've had a "rough" life, but I've struggled with some issues just like everyone else. I have not always felt so deep-rooted in my faith, I have fought health issues (involving my stomach), I have been in a marriage dominated by lies, deceptions, and addictions. I have felt lonely, felt restless, felt unsettled.
But as this day rolls around, all that prevails in me is peace. I am surrounded by the truth that God is in control - and I've decided to willingly let go and let HIM take over. I have a family who lifts me up and feeds my soul with love. I have this little boy who I can't wait to wake up beside every single day - he is my reason for everything... I have friends who love me, a great job that allows me enough money to support my son and a good, long summer break, I have a warm bed and fulfillment in my heart. I feel so blessed on this day, my 28th birthday!

This weekend was soooo great...I took Max to the Playhouse Disney show in Evansville on Sat. and he absolutely loved it!! We saw Handy Manny and his tools, Tiger & Pooh, Little Einsteins, and all the gang from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse:) Here is my little man at the show - showing off the toy I splurged for (can you believe they charge $18 for this thing!!) and then I TRIED to get a picture of us together, but you know how that goes!!

Then on Sunday we went to church, got in an awesome nap in the afternoon, and headed to a little birthday party with friends:) Here is a picture of all of us celebrating Gabe's birthday at El Ranchito in Bloomfield - a couple people snuck out before the photo, but this is most of us!What an amazing way to top off a great weekend - surrounded by great friends and good Mexican food:) The great friends part was the best, though:)! ha ha!! Love you all and hope you have a GREAT week!! It's sectional time - so see you at the games!!